Walking the Talk

Talking about doing something is one thing.

Actually doing it is another.

Over Thanksgiving, I was watching TV with mi madre and a commercial came on about donating to a foundation that helps educate poverty stricken kids in another country. The lady of the house commented on how amazing it would be to do what those people on the TV are doing: helping children. I told her that she could do that now without ever having to leave the U.S. In fact, she could do that without ever having to leave her zip code. Haha, she blew me off after I told her how volunteering at one of the local schools is easy enough to do.

A couple weeks ago City Year Seattle's Young Heroes program started up again. This is the team I was on while a member of City Year. This go around, I am only an adult volunteer termed a "Team Leader". I have a gaggle of middle school students who look up to me almost every Saturday for leadership in some aspect.



Young Heroes' program is designed to teach middle school students about social issues within their city and then to perform active service relating to that issue (this past weekend they learned about the Muscular Dystrophy Association and stuffed envelopes for the annual Hop-A-Thon fundraiser - interested? Go here: Seattle MDA). I was the person who planned the curriculum part of the day when I was a corps member.

Right now, these middle school students are not completely aware of the good they are/will be performing every Saturday service day. They are not children with messiah complexes. They are only showing up because 1) their parents are making them, 2) their friends go, 3) they want to meet new friends, or 4) they want to hang out with the Josh. Okay, okay, so that last one might be a bit of a stretch, but you get the picture.

When our team last year got interviewed by the national manager for Young Heroes teams we were asked what we expect the kids to take from the Saturdays. We all responded that we wanted them to learn about the subject of the service day but I also added that I hope they have a seed planted. Yeah, so maybe these young people will not become the next Mother Theresa after performing service to Seattle's community for a day, but the thought will be there. It will grow as they grow and will affect how they live their lives down the road. That's the best we can hope for; that what we are doing creates the leaders of tomorrow.

Whoever coined the "Power of Youth" got it right. Young adults working with teenagers at making tomorrow better than today. There is power in what we do and the ripple effect created from one day of service is going to reverberate for centuries to come.

Pop Songs and Romance

It's tearing up my heart when I'm with you

But when we are apart, I feel it too
And no matter what I do, I feel the pain
with or without you

Baby I don't understand
Just why we can't be lovers
Things are getting out of hand
Trying too much, but baby we can't win

Let it go If you want me girl, let me know

I am down on my knees I can't take it anymore

Blah, blah, blah, right? I know, I know. Trying to gain the sympathy card is so last year and two seasons ago.

Whatever, I do what I want.

And my version of this song would not apply to any girls (sorry ladies).

I re-sync'ed my ipod to my laptop about a week ago and added a ton of songs that are new to the ipod's memory (this is interesting only because my ipod has been playing the same songs since I left Missouri - well over a year ago). Including the above (and the rest of the lyrics) little ditty called "It's Tearing Up My Heart" by NSYNC. It's funny how a song from the nineties will apply so much to the now.

In the not so distance past things between myself and Cole ended. If he reads this, he will probably roll his eyes and make that chuckling noise. Oh well.

I have had my share of one-nighters and weekend trysts. I've had even less real relationships. Cole was something so entirely different. I was never challenged by anyone I have ever been with until him. The beginning was amazing. Difficult at times, but amazing nonetheless.
Somewhere along the road things changed. I know for a fact that I did not change, it resulted from something else.

Our chances and times to hang out started to go away completely. Almost every night was changed to a few times a week. Then, I was lucky enough to see him twice a week. Next up, nothing but every other week. The typical man-gets-rid-of-man sequence was made possible by the original just-stop-talking-to-each-other play.

The lyrics I copied and pasted above speak exactly to how Cole and I worked. At times, I hated being with him. He would drive me insane and I would want nothing but to be away. Yet, when I was away from him, I would want nothing but to be with him. Is it possible to be so simultaneously obsessed and annoyed by one person?

I removed him from my friends on facebook and myspace while also deleting his phone number from my cell (admittedly not before I recorded it into my telephone/address black book). He wrote me thinking this was what my wrath looks like but to be honest, it's not. I'm trying to avoid jealousy and more heart problems... ahem. Try not to let out the fact that I actually do have a heart: I have a reputation to uphold. I felt the step was necessary for me to try and get over the man. Getting fucked and ignored in the same day is not something I ever want to happen again. Well, that can't be avoided with one night stands, haha, but definitely should not happen with someone you used to (used to? do I really mean past tense?) love.

I learned from us. And if the rest of the song plays out it's going to be a bumpy ride. But hey, Fievel didn't go west to be stuck in heartbreak-mode.

This entry is not a plea to get him back. It's just me writing things out. I do that, and have for a long time. I miss the guy something fierce but every day that "miss you" factor decreases.

Whoever said it was right, time heals everything. It's going to hurt, but every thing's going to be okay.

How to Completely Miss New Years...

You've been invited to some party in Pioneer Square. It sounds sketch but totally doable. Here's your selling points: Live music, only a ten dollar cover, and.... here's the real clincher.... OPEN BAR.

15 Steps towards maximizing your night of completely missing New Year's follow below.

First step:

Sleep late. Get up on New Year's Eve and have just one bowl of extremely hot oatmeal. Not just any oatmeal, but organic oatmeal that your friend (preferably named Jane) left for you when she moved to New York.

Eating this, and only this, is important because you will be low on calories for the day and who can get drunk on a full stomach?

Second Step:

Go work for a few hours just to get your blood pumping and to feel a little sense of being productive. Doing this will also lend you the believability of actually having something to celebrate.

Third Step:

Whip out that huge bottle of wine you bought a couple days before in preparation. If you're like me, it's a white wine that has been chilled. No reds or warms in this house. Open and prepare to enjoy.

Fourth Step:

Crank up some music. For once in your life you have the entirety of the house to yourself. Yes people, all thirteen of my roommates went home for the holidays. I preferred the song "Bossy" by Lindsey Lohan as the mood setter for my night of debauchery.

Fifth Step:

After having drank half of the bottle of wine, look up the next bus that will take you downtown. Go run drunkenly to the bus and ride it. I know, I know, Ginuwine's song "Pony"comes to mind when I mention riding in this paragraph but let's refrain from giving any of the other passengers the most awesome lap dance of their lives while riding down I-5.

Sixth Step:

Skip down one of the many hills in Seattle's downtown area and get lucky by running right into your friends on their way to the same party. Head together as a unit to the site described on the flier.

Seventh Step:

Pay cover to get in. Deal with the random stares and even the occasional comment from some dude that sounds suspiciously like "Oh, no." Find a place to store the group's coats and get in line at the bar!

Eighth Step:

While getting free booze from the bar make sure to flirt with both the man and woman who is running it. They appear to be a couple and this studio-esque place you are in might be where they work.

Ninth Step:

Finish off the party's handle of whiskey. Then start in on the vodka.

Tenth Step:

Hit on friend's boyfriend.

Eleventh Step:

Take numerous drunken photos that will not be remembered the next day.

Twelfth Step:

Black out.

Thirteenth Step:

Wake up on bus #10 at the end of it's route. Respond to the bus driver as eloquently as possible when he asks you "Party too hard?" and then be thankful that he is going to allow you to stay on the bus while he takes his break and then heads back into Seattle.

Fourteenth Step:

Get off the bus randomly. Walk around randomly. Randomly run into 23rd Avenue and start heading north towards the university district.

Fifteenth Step:

Walk all the way home intermittently crying, laughing, and shouting. Bonus points if you can successfully pull off looking like a drunk hobo.


So what's the moral of this story? I guess the only possible one is this: drink responsibly.

I don't remember New Year's happening. There was no kissing at midnight (not like there would have been - my love life sucks). No champagne (I think). Not a lot of fun.

Well okay, that last part was a lie. I always have fun with my friends.

Yeah. So there you have it. Fifteen steps to completely miss your New Year's.