Whewwww

It's been forever since I have written on this thing. I've been busy. Or, uhh, not so much busy, but having a lot of fun doing anything and everything.

I'm not ready for putting my thoughts into words yet, but I should be soon.

However, I do have an interesting little story:

This past weekend seemed like the weekend of birthday parties. I went to two, each on a different night. The Saturday night party had something totally weird happen.

The party was for a guy I worked and lived with who I met at City Year. He is staying on to do another year of service and lives with a bunch of girls who are pretty good friends of mine. I went because it was starting early enough to be a good pre-party location before going out for the night. The fella and I aren't really that close of friends, but I do love the girls I know that he lives with now. I also suspected to know a lot of the other guests who were going to show up.

The theme for this party was circus. I didn't dress up, but there were plenty of bearded ladies, genies, tigers, tiger trainers, carnies, etc... I was one of the few lames not in costume. But I was full of booze! So I feel I made up for my lack of cool clothes. I also, for once, brought alcohol to share. Yeah, I'm a cheap ass.

Part way through the night, I am sitting on the front porch reminiscing, making fun of, and laughing at plenty of people/things/nouns when we notice this guy coming across the street. He's clearly already trashed. He introduces himself and starts going on about the party and asking if it's a private one. Everything about him reminds me of home. He is completely like the guys I grew up with and even a lot of the guys I would hang out every once and awhile in college (not my close friends, more like Dan's friends).

I start by giving him shit. He takes it like a man, which gains some respect from me because I can be pretty... umm... obnoxious when I'm drunk and feel like my territory is being invaded (yeah, I know, this isn't even my house, but damn if I'm acting like it is). He has a beer with him and sits down on the steps while the harassment continues. By this time, I'm the only one harassing him. A friend, Sarai is sitting with us and there are a few of our other friends behind us in their own conversations. A girl we don't know comes over not too long after he sits down.

Turns out, she's his wife. He doesn't believe in wearing his wedding ring. They are 25. He's in the Army. They are visiting friends who live right across the street and he has a habit of running off when he's drunk.

I no longer care if he's there anymore. He seems harmless enough, so I start talking to his wife. Somehow (probably me being who I am and asking really inappropriate things), I find out that she and her hair dresser are questioning his sexuality.

Yeah, I was totally rethinking his level of welcomness to the party. As in, come, have my alcohol. I'm not going to lie, dudes in uniform are hot.

I can tell that his wife is ready to go home and she tries to get this guy to come with her (I feel so Don't Ask Don't Tell so his name isn't even going to be on here) but he completely shuts her down. She leaves in a huff.

By this time. I am sitting on his right down a step and Sarai is sitting on his left up a step from him. No one else is paying any attention to us anymore, he's just some guy who decided to come to our party. There were plenty of other guests there that weren't known by everyone.

Army guy asks me if he's cock blocking me from Sarai. We both laugh at him and I let him know that I'm gay. He's like, "really? No way." "Way." He then lets me know that he never would have guessed and that he's cool with me as long as I don't hit on him. I thank him for the compliment and tell him he has nothing to worry about me hitting on his ass and we continue doing what we were doing, plus one thing: his leg is suddenly flush against mine although Sarai is doing most of the talking and we are looking in her direction. I'm thinking is Army guy hitting on me? WTF mate? and I test things a little by sliding my leg a little bit away from him. Sure enough, his leg is right back up against mine within seconds.

After a while, we go back into the house to get some more alcohol. Sarai is talking to her boo while Army guy and I are cruising the house looking for everyone. I am grabbing a beer out of the living room when my friend Katie comes up to me and tells me that Army guy just told everyone in the kitchen that I'm his buddy and that he'd fuck me if I wasn't gay.

Hahaha

He comes out of the kitchen a minute or two later and we go back outside. He wants to go back to his apartment and get some more alcohol and wants me to go with him. I tell him that's probably not a good idea and he says that there's no one there so no one will even know if we go there. I ask him where his wife went and he says that he doesn't know but she didn't go there.

Well, we go across the street to the apartment. I know I know, dangerous. But danger was the last thing on my mind. And really, besides him not being able to feel pain, I knew I was way more sober than him and no amount of combat training was going to save his ass if he tried to pull something on me. Just a statement of fact (go Krav Maga, bitches). He makes this strong mojito complete with the leafy things (minus being ground up) and gives it to me. We take a shot of something (Hot Damn maybe? I can't remember). And the night starts to go south.

While we were at the house, nothing really happened. There was no action like there would be in any porno that may have started off the same way as this. The most that happened was the completely unrequired amount of body brushes and sides touching that was going on while shot taking and making drinks and exploring the apartment.

We eventually head back to the party where I start dancing with another friend of mine, Tai. I think we were showing off, but I can't remember to whom. During this time was when things started going down hill with Army guy and everyone else at the party. Most of the people left had all moved into one of the bedrooms and he was apparently crashing the entire thing. When I finally went in search of him, people were pissed and he was no longer allowed to stay.

We all go outside and he acts like he is going away but really just hides in some trees at the house next door. He can totally be seen. He eventually crosses the street, picks up a "Sidewalk Closed" sign, and comes back to where I'm sitting on this concrete wall in front of the house. He puts down the sign and sits right next to me. He wants to go back into the party but I tell him that's a bad idea. He asks if he's an asshole and if he ruined things. I tell him that I have no idea what he did but people don't want him back in the house so I wasn't going to let him go back in. Eventually, I notice that some of my friends are sitting on the steps behind us. He must have noticed too because he says that we should go back to the apartment. I can see people's reflections moving in the windows of the apartment now so I know that people are home. I tell him that he should go but I'm staying. I give him the mojito cup and tell him to go home to his wife.

He then asks me something very not married like:

"Will you come back with me and have sex with me and my wife?"

Uhh? I tell him that married people aren't supposed to be doing that and he says that the Army has the highest percentages of divorce and also, this is where he gets very serious, that his wife can handle us both: "she likes cock."

Apparently someone else does too, Army guy... you.

He stands up and starts pulling on my arm to get me to go back with him. I offer to take him home, but that's it. I take him as far as the steps. He goes up, I stay at the bottom and he stops at the top and asks me if I've ever seen this movie (I can't remember the name - alcohol ate it out of my memory) and starts babbling about something else. The door to the apartment opens and two other guys come out. I'm now looking up at three guys, two new ones on either side of Army guy. One is his brother and the other is the owner of the apartment. They ask if I've been babysitting him all night and I say that my friends and I have at out party across the street. He then tells them he wants to go back but I say that's not a good idea and remind him about how he's not liked over there. He asks again if he's an asshole and I say "Looks that way." The other guys thank me again and take him inside.

I go back, grab some cold chicken, and sit on the porch to eat. Wouldn't you know it but I see the apartment door open and here comes Army guy running down the steps wearing a baseball cap now. He comes up and stops on the steps and starts talking to me. Asking me if he can come in and stay with me. I tell him that I don't live here and he can't come in. He asks where I live and I tell him the general area. Before anything else can be done Tai and Katie come outside and he says "I guess I'll be going then. Do you know where Dante's is?" We give him directions, he wanders off drunkenly, and that was it. Haven't heard or seen him since.

I stay with the girls a little longer and then walk home. I don't live terribly far from them, but it's a hike nonetheless.

Along the way, I replay everything that happened. I wondered why the hell I was so interested in this guy because besides the fact that he initiated and encouraged everything, I was positively responsive. I could have completely shot him down and made his life hell, but I didn't. Thinking back, I can only attribute my actions to three things: Alcohol, the fact that he reminded me of home, and his obvious no questions asked need to be around me. I respond to things like that (yay growing up in broken homes!).

It would have never worked (hello, the fucker was married!) despite the uniform. I had something going on the next day that is something that can work (something that I hope does) and is much much more healthy for me.

Army guy is probably gone, but the lesson isn't. It's all just a part of growing up and finding out who I am.

That being said, I feel more clarity and closure regarding the entire thing. I need these types of things. I write out what I feel, observe, witness, experience, and explore. That doesn't mean I can't converse, but I prefer to have the hard copy.

And that's just cool with me.