Failing isn't always so bad...

This morning I received word back on something that I kept a sort of secret. Although, now looking back, it was kinda of silly of me to do so.

I applied to Teach For America (TFA) earlier this semester never once thinking I would get as far as I did. That was a partial reason for my secrecy, I don't like to fail and I especially don't like to have others see me fail. I never thought I would get into Teach For America so I didn't tell any of my friends about it. I also knew some of my other friends were applying as well.

Well, I was surprised when I found out I made it past the application process and was being asked to participate in a phone interview. Still, I told no one. It wasn't until after my phone interview and finding out that I was actually being asked to participate in the final interview that I started telling people.

By this time, others I know who had applied did not get accepted or as far as I had. Their responses seemed to be angry and put out. I didn't want to cause a problem by letting them know that I too was trying it out.

I wasn't nervous about the final interview. I've done so many interviews in my lifetime that it no longer affects me.

I went into the final interview with this philosophy: "If I get it, awesome. I know I will do amazing. If I don't get it, then that's cool too. I would have done horribly then if I had somehow gotten past the 'Fate' police." I am a firm believer in things happening for a reason. I honestly believe that now, in me not getting accepted into the 2007 corps (yeah, it's official) that this is how things were supposed to go. I also understand that those who have been picked are going to be amazing and they are going to bring a lot of good into this world to people who deserve it so much.

I definitely didn't want to become one of the bitter folks who were upset with TFA for not accepting them. I can see what TFA is doing, and it is amazing that there are quality people out there working at progress. Haha, I only hope that there were some people in my interview group who got in. I had a lot of fun with those folks.

I will admit that a part of me was hoping I wouldn't get it. Probably more of me than was hoping I would get it. Being a teacher in that corps is going to be a lot of work. I don't know if I possess that level of ability, but I am pretty confident that those who do get invited into the corps are capable and will serve as great mentors for kids all over this country.

So, I didn't get it, and that's cool with me. I'm not bummed out, I'm not going to mope around. I'm just going to do my thing and be me.

Guess that means I'm really going to have to start looking for a job!